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17
today i turn 17. Yesterday i was writing about the same thing. And it turns out that my thoughts changed in one day. arghh why bother with the stupid punctuation ...ill just say this in my own way ...yesterday i wrote about how it didnt matter what today was ...and how this was my worst birthday ever ...for two weeks ago something happened that made me lose all my will to live ..i could die just then and it wouldnt matter..i still have a part of that ..still look to the future and see blinks of light but no real flame ..still feel this twisted emptiness in my chest...in a way i tried to make this day as miserible as the past two weeks..i thought it wouldnt matter ..in the end ..but today many people combined to make this a special day for me ..they made an effort to make my life better even if it was just a simple gesture ...a simple "happy birthday" ..then i realized how much of a jackass i am ..im surrounded by all these wonderfull people and i hide in my own coccon ...so now i make a vow ...a vow to be a better friend ...a better brother for all of those beautiful people ...if any part of me bother you just tell me in the face and ill try my best to become a better person ...and if any one of you need someone to talk to ..ever ..im always here :)..thank you everyone
big day tomorrow
well ..it finnaly came ..the day that every teenager hates ..grr school starts today ..4 hours from now ...AND I CANT SLEEP ..whaaa. this is gonna be aloooong day but then ...this is a day ive been waiting for ..today ...i will be faced with the truth ..the truth of my feelings ...someone once said you cant choose who you love ..or hate ..i know there is truth behind those words ..wish me luck :)
my way or the highway :P
ouch ouch ...i just had 10 hours of sleep ..and i still feel like im gonna break apart any second now ...y'see ..me and my friend "mkq" went to welcome another friend who was supposed to come today early morning "12:20 am"...turns out hs not on that plane ...but we had so much fun in the airport ..hehehe ..anyyywas ..we did our biggest accomplishment yet and returned home using rollerskates ...from muharaq and across manama ..we even got down that huge "MM" bridge onm skates ..maan that was HYPER ...by the time we reached home we were a mess .."almost 5:00 am "..but that was good ...y'know ..even though "mkq" can be celf-centered and just plain selfish sometimes ..he is really something ..i think thats the thing that bonds us ...we are alike more than i know ..at times of my life i considered him my best friend ..but i changed and he changed ..well nothing stays the same...
anyways ..now im gonna get all psychological"if thats even a word " an' stuff..im gonna talk about something that i noticed throughout my 16 years and listening to many people talk about themselves..you might even already noticed this yourselves ..but i dont give a damn :P ...im here to talk so thats what im gonna do ..ok here goes ...
I was a listener to many people ..i would sit there while they spilled their guts ..about many subjects ...some sounded silly to me ..some were of great importance that i was scared to comment on them ..and not everytime im done with them that it ends up happily ever after ...anyways ...in ALL the talks i had , i noticed somethinhg ..everyone had this sad tragic story in the background, and this is what i call the "tragic hero scenario " ..hehe sounds funny doesnt it ..?? but everyone does it ..everyone has a story behind them which makes them the victim, a story or even which justifyes all their actions, even I have one. In the mind of this person even a silly story which might mean nothing to you "the listener" can become so important that its this person's very existence ..it might control your life ..and you never even know it ..ok ..i dunno where to go from here ..so 'till the next post
say that u
hey ..damn ...something went wrong again ...something always goes wrong ..and it leaves me feeling terrible ..im going through so many things at the moment ...one of the biggest and most important conflicts in my life is raging in my mind ...and im losing hair on the back of my head ..i didnt mind much at first ..ive run this scenario in my head before and i was emotionally prepaired for it ..its one of the things that i do ...sometimes when im all alone and thinking about stuff ..i run deffirent scnarios in my head ..from going bald to knowing that i have two weeks to live ..ive gone through "going blind" and "losing a family member" ..and even "losing the person i care most for" ..i guess its a good way for prepairing myself emotionally for it ..sure its not the same thing ..but at least i wont be completly struck by it ...annnyways ..back to the main subject ...i was able to come in terms with my problem ..i didnt care much "id lie if i said i didnt care completly "
..but then today my cousin's kept laughing and pointing beind my back ..i acted like i was too stupid to understand whats going on ..i kept talking about other stuff and smiling at them ...its the foxfire mask i keep on ...the naive ,careless,stupid guy ...but i always understand whats going on ..and it bothered me ..A LOT..huff ..this sux ..
there are many things i cant write here just yet ..i hope the day comes when i can say everything //...'till then
but im on the outside
mmmm today im leaving london and going back home. Even though im happy coz ill see my friends again, there is still sadness that ill be leaving ..to tell the truth there is a part of me that doesnt wanna leave just yet. waaaaaah .. anyyyways ..ill be in bahrain monday morning ..
see ya guys then
the sacrifise is never knowing
i had quite a fight with my sis yesterday ...i was playing my new videogame ..and she orders me to stop playing because she wants to watch some TV .she does that often ..she never asks for a favour ..she issues an order ...even though shes 8 years older than me , i still think i should be given some respect ..anyways, usually after im given an order "from my dad or my sis" ..i reply with the usuall "yes sir", and keep up all the evil thoughts botteled within ..well ..yesterday ..i kinda exploded ...i know its a bit silly ..but too much silliness can cause great danger "in my case :P" ..i yelled at her ..then stormed out of the room ..i was so mad ..i wanted her to come for me and ask forgivness ...thats my job usually ..after every fight i get into ..i be the good boy and go and ask for forgivness ..sometimes i wonder why i do that ..but i guess after a while it seems right ...so thats what i did today ...whilst yesterday the same time i wouldnt have done it if they paid me ...anyways ..there are so many things i wanna say ..but i cant ..please be safe *******
its been a while
did you hear that song??? its kinda nice ...you should try it , anyways ..its been a while since i blogged ...its like im back to where i started ..i log on my blog ..and i log out ..without writing anything , so many things have been happening ..and most arent so pleasent..but the clouds are already clearing up ..i hope i can see sunshine soon ..:)
, anyways ....ermmm see all the thoughts are gone already ..
, ..some important people to me are going through a terrible experience ..or so ive been told ..i really wish i could do something to help , but dunno if im important to them ..
well whatever ..life sux ..gotta go ..
how come i can never come up with a decent name?
argh ...im so tired ...you ever tried keeping control over 4 boys in an arcade video centre ..well its a lotta work ..but i was able to survive ..barely ..hehe :P..but i had fun ..and i got to know my long lost relatives even more..but its annoying sometimes how you have to act miture ...ive been having to do that a lot ..even with my older cousins ...some times they have fun but it bothers people ..i tell them to stop ..they look at me in that youre-no-fun way ..and its annoying ..its hard having to grow up ..isnt it ...anyways ..i need a couple of days off ..with no commitment ..thats the annoying thing with having to live in a flat ..you never get the full vecation experince ...i mean ..you still have to do chores ..and listen to orders an' stuff ..and i need to go to the library ..i might find something that can help me ..i sure hope so ...anyways ...see ya
reunion ???
heeeey ...i met my step-family today ...and theyre soooo cool ...i mean i played connect-4 with my step grandmother and super mario bros with my step uncle..how cool can a family get...oh and not mentioning my step- cousin which are two adorable kids ..i really had fun today ..hope i can see more of them in the future...i got other matters at hand ...well these things are kinda private ..but lets just say i met someone of my kind ...hmm not in a talkative mood today ..so ..see ya
hehe..two rants, one day
hmmm never done this before ..but im so excited ..i know im overreacting to all of this ..but i met my step-cousins today ..two boys ..and theyre soo cute ..hey dont get me wrong theyre just kids an' i happen to like kids..i think theyre naive and cute ..ok myabe not all of them but hey..life sux...anyways..i wanna know more about my family so i guess i might visit or take them out or somethin'...its hard to keep up when yoou have 4 grandmothers..heh...i dont know much about the other two though ..i heard they were from foriegn countrys..dunno if i wanna meet them . im going to a theme park tomowrrow ..something was bothering my cousin and shes not coming ..i think im dying inside ..all this emotion restraining had caused me to become colder when i have to express emotion ..now when i see someone upset i think to myself "feh..how pethatic ..go cry it out will'ya"..whilst a year ago i would have at least shown some concern..maaan i dont know if this is good ....
earlier i had a million things to say ..now ...nothing..
i cant come up with anything
i still cant figure out how to put spaces in this stupid blog..grr my rants seem so messed up like this ...anyways..im waiting for my friends to come to mirc right now ..like we all "promised" we would ...but noone is showing up ...oh and speaking of friends ...i dreamt of my childhood friend today ...damn..i feel kinda sad when i think about it ..we were friends all through elementary ..in my country there is this almost "racist" thing going on ..its all about religious beliefs ..the "sinna" and the "shi3a"..its a big deal in a kid's life ..you would hang out with the kids in your same ermmm belief ..but we kinda broke that rule ..we were on deffirent side yet we were so good together ..damn why did it have to happen ..it started when he changed schools ..then i saw less and less of him ..and now ..its been almost 6 years and i havent seen him ...but in my dream its like i met him and we "got together" again ..i saw his family an' everyone ...you think thats a sign???
well i guess thats life ..people meet and people part ..life sux ..oh and there is this deal goin on with my father ..we were never close..me and him ..the most we see of each other is when the whole family travels ..and even then he would critisice my ever action ...nothing was good enough for him ...and noone ever won an argument with him ..he just has to be right ..so you can imagine ..we always argued ..looking back on my life ..i never had one real serious conversation with him ..a father-son conversation ...never..and i cant remember him hangin' out or doing anything with me ..i saw this episode of a tv series called "boy meets world" that revolves quite surprisingly about a boy ...and hes upset coz his father doesnt do as many things he does with his brother ...and the brother is upset coz his dad doesnt do as much talking with him as he does to his brother ..talk about demanding ...enough about TV..so you can see how messed up my relationship is with my dad ..so this year i decide im gonna try to do something to fix it ..i try to argue less with him ..and act partly as a friend and partly as a "slave" ..i do what he wants without arguing ..yet i try to act as if with a friend ..but even in this weirdo way we argue ...the last i kinda shouted back at him ..which made me feel bad ..but i was pissed ..evn though im tring so hard to make it better hes just sitting there not making any effort to make this work ..akhh parents ..my friends are still not here ..i wanna talk about something kinda important with one of them ..i really hope he shows up..
hmmmm dunno ...whatever you want
...just before i entered this page i was full of things i wanted to write about ...now its all gone ....the human mind is a very funny thing ..oh yeah ..i bought a little notebook ..i thought id write in it all the things i cant write here ...turns out its harder than i thought ...typing is a lot faster and you can write down the thoughts as fast as they come to you ...mmm if i had money i would have gotten a laptop ...but then i can always dream ..and those dreams can you help you in real life ..i know ...they can give you strength and confidence in yourself ..i dream a lot ..not as the vision you see in your sleep ..but the other kind of dreaming ...the one that happens al the time ...some people dream of cars ...some people dream of money ..some people dream of other people ...i am one of those people .."although im not as interested in cars as many otyher" ...but i dream of possession ..i dream of money sometimes ..and i dream of someone ...heh ...that last dream tends to make me weak sometimes .but also it had been a great source of streangth at times ...enough with this ...someday im gonna print all this and put it all in a file ...then i can look at them and laugh at my self when im older ..hehe ..mmm i dont think im writing this for anyone ..im writing it for my self ...unlike some other "certin" people ..i know i live for my self ...yet im more than glad to take out parts of my life for others ...in the end its all about me ..noone is gonna help me and i wont be able to help anyone ...life is a huge teest ...and in it lies many little quizs ..some requier "how in the world do you spell that " sacrifices ...well yesterday i passed a quiz ..with the help of someone ..do you know when you think about someone ..you dont wanna desappoint this person ..you try your best ..thats what happened ..the thought o this person lent me streangth to beat my own demons ...oh yeah .i bought this book on life stratigies for teens...in fact thats what its called ...it seems interesting ...not much time for reading these days ...aww maaan ...now i have that sinking feeling in my chest ..like a void ..i hate it ..i bet you know what im talking about ...whatever ...oh ...my cousin caled ..i have to go ...
what can i say .........
i know that i promised the next rant would be more fun but things happen ..life is weird, life sux i know ...one moment you're on top of the world and the next you're breakin' ...nothing makes sense ..we're living in one ****** up world ...but we humans have no choise ..we have to live it anyways ...
i dont wanna go into religion or anything ...and i have no right to ..since i havent been so religious myself lately ..but i have faith in my god ..i know he will help everyone who really believes get through this test ..one way or another ...and in the end ...the grand prize will be ours ..i hope .
this rant is especially dedicated to a dear friend of mine ...get a grip maan ..i shouldnt be one to talk after that show i put up on my last rant ..but its my duty as a friend ...I have to be strong ..not just for myself..but for everyone who believes in me ..it can be quite a burden sometimes ...everyone needs a break ..but ill try my best to meet everyone's expectations ...
look sadex..no matter how messed up your life seems ..it will clear out someday ...well you might think its all BS at the moment ..but just believe in yourself ...sometimes you have to take the blame for things you havent even done ...but that might not be all true ...well this is my method anywyas ...sometimes i just cant take the blame anymore ...to hell with them all ..i know i am not at fault ..i know im better than everyone in this goddamn place ..i am me ...i do what i want ..the way i want to ...if anyone has problem then screw him ...ok ...i know its not excactly a noble way of dealing with your life but screw that too ..i am human ..i am not perfect ..noone is perfect ..if they cant accept that ..you know the rest
so get a grip and believe in yourself maaan ..we are here for you...and if you wanna talk or anything ..im here ..i already know too much about you anyways ;P ...so dont be embarressed...alright
i hope you feel better ...
huh...wha?
i got no idea why im here again ...well thats not entirely true ...i needed to talk ..and maybe im just hoping that someone is gonna read this ..or maybe im hoping noone would ...
i always feel weak and vaunarable when opening up ..and talking about myself, my problems..i always talked with people about "their" problems ..i was a bestfriend and brother to many ...well sorry guys ...i still cant find "my" bestfriend..my "brother" ..i look at your faces and i dont see anyone im completly comfortable with ...someone who i can speak with, and trust completly ...at times i think i have this "someone" ..but then something happens that causes me to change my mind .
im tired of keeping all this inside of me ...someday ill break ..i think ,,
in real life im not like this .i try my best to put up a happy cheerfull face ...to lift up my friends' spirits ..and to hide my other side ...my weak yet strong side ...and as i said earlier ..im still dont know wether i want anyone to read this ..i came to pitas a while ago ..but i just ended up logging off ...i wasnt strong enough ..am i now?
well maybe this is just the beggining to a habit ...ill try to be fun the next times i write anything here ....
i cant stop thinking of "*******"..it had been hunting me a lot ..i thought that going abroad well help me get over it ...for i dont know if its real or not ...i dont know what to hope for ...i dont know what to wish for
god help me
huh...wha?
An' I'm about to break
Mmmmmm i still think the main purpose blogging is to talk about one's despair to someone. even if no one listens, i still feel a little bit better when i rant "if this word means what I'm thinking of". Anyways..last night i was about to sleep but before i went to bed i thought i'd check out what movie they're showing in the moviechannel. It wasn't any movie i heard of before..but it still inerested me..it was about a 14 years old boy who's life was so messed up that mine seems so happy. I couldn't tear my self away from the T.V...i just had to know what was gonna happen in the end..anywyas...by the time the movie was over the kid was in jail for stealing and i was thinking that my life isn't so bad and im supposed to be happy ...but even so this feeling in my chest says otherwise.."i got three of my mid-term grades today..dunno if i was expecting better or worst".
I try to feel happy but i can't, I try to enjoy being sad and that's not an option..what's the meaning of all of this?
foxfire's bad mood
ok/,,,,life sux....these two words are the wisest ive heard in a while...damn im in a crappy mood..in fact the crappiest mood i had in a loong time....first i couldnt see this certin "somebody" after waiting for ages for it...then i discovered that being a socialized person isnt all good...ok imagine this..you try to be friendly with some people...but then they decide they dont wanna see your face anymore...and they dont tell you this in the face ..they choose someone."the most ruthless". to come and tell you that...included with "youre a pest" in the end...how would you feel after that ...like hell i bet...and not only that ...after that you have to keep your promise to somebody and do something you dont really like instead of things that can make your life a much better place...and then get stuck with one of the most annoying persons on earth...//...oh and then you meet a person who makes you remember some not very happy memories...and the conclusion is being lectured on how youre wrong and how much of a loser you are .......LIFE SUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUX
honestly dont know wether to feel happy or sad
yahoo "you shouldnt press too much at the end ...try to read it the japanese way"...do you think its wrong to express one's feelings...coz thats what im going to do..and because im not perfect i might say some things which are wrong...my country is supposed to be going through sad days at the moment ..i dont wanna get into details..but i must say that a great leader and hero was betrayed and murdered long ago in these days..thats why i should be sad...well i do feel sad whn i remember it...and i swear that if i could go back in time and die in his place i would..gladly...but i hate feeling sad...and i hate it when im forced to .....and today i went skating ...had fun..made some new friends and learned some new moves...why should i be sad.....mmm as usuall im out of things to say in the middle of it...
if only i could tell you
hmmmmm not to get out of the subject ...fear you say ...ayuru-chan ...strangly i just had a nightmare 2 days ago...and i dont get lots of nightmare..i dont remember it exaclty but i think it was a weird opening "not sure if it was part of the main dream though "...it was like that scene from X-the movie..when kamui is holding fuuma's head..after he killed him...i was holding someone's head "cant remember clearly who it was"...when i felt a presence near me ..i turn around and i see a huge figure dressed i a crimson robe...its face hidden in shadows "i dont think it had one"..in the dream i knew it was an avatar of death ..it just stood there ...looming over me ....and wherever i go ..i see it looking my way ...like it was waiting for someting...like it wanted to take someting ..and i knew it was my soul ...all the time in reality im think that death is not something i feared...but in the dream i feared it...like i wasnt sure wether im going to hell or heaven ....it was sooooo creepy ..brrrr
the right kind of wrong
hmmm im listening to "the right kind of wrong " by leann rimes now...i love the music...and the part in the movie "coyote ugly"when the heroine plays it is one of my favourites...but i wonder about the lyrics ..is there such a thing as the right kind of wrong..hmmm that makes you wonder...anyyyways its really nice..you should get it...
i went to the weirdest party of my life tonight...hmm maybe not exactly the weirdest "i remember some really uniqe ones...ne jewels"//..whatever ..it was a rock party,with bands an' all...it was kinda cool ..but there were htings i thought i wouldnt find here in bahrain...met some guyz from school there too...well then ...why does this always happen to me...when im writing and writing when all of a sudden i run out of thoughts...tough luck guyz :P
pringles
yoo///....i couldnt decide on a tiltle so i put the name of the potato chips im eating now.....anyyways..hoooy ayuru-chaaan get me that last part ...ok :))...its just soooo important ...ive got a test tomowrrow.....i have to studyy..but i wanna go skate too..hmm what to dooo,,,maybe i can take the books with me...ill study now as well...yahhaa..hmmm i dunno what to write anymore...so 'till later
i hate school
well....as i said before for countless times...school sux..i got tons of homeworks that i dont feel like doing..and probably wont do until im in class and the teacher is asking about it...to hell...oh yeah ayuru-chan..thank fro the tapes ..and thank nata-chan for the adorable drawing ..iits so cooool...and no thans for the manga-freaks club...half the last episode of berserk is csensored .."grumble grumble" now i wont know what happened till i download the episode...waaah and just when things were getting real messy ...anyyyways....me have to leave nowww got a class to catch
i never had a dream come true ,till the day that i found you
hey minna...before i started writing i had lots in my mind to say ...but now..i seem to have forgotten it all.. O.o..oh yeah ..here i go.,in the last two months ive been spending a lot of time at this game centre thing in the mall..i really enjoy helpin' out in there...i meet lots of people and make so many friends..mostly kids..but i know many adults too .:)..i feel im more usefull there than anywhere else,,dunno..maybe im gonna get a part-time job or somethin' somday ,,thatd be cool..im already a good friend with most of the staff..i just been to a movie ...its called "bedazzled",,its a romantic/comedy 15 so it had its share of not-so-cleac scenes...but dunno why i feel like this movie had a good point..its about this guy who loves a girl...but he doesnt feel he's good enough ..but then the devil makes a deal with him..he gets 7 wishes but he has to give his soul..anyways..every wish he makes turns against him in some weird twisted way ..but then in the end ...he doesnt want to make the last wish ..the devil makes him do it by scaring him..but his last wish was so simple..in the time he was in a crisis...he wished that the girl that he loves would have a happy life...so simply ,so truly,without thinking...it affected me deeply...i hope it does to you too..jaaa
sunflower seeds
hmmmmmm i dunno how to start this post...by being upset or happy...i think the happy part should come first..oook here i go ...YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY THEY GOT THE NEW SKATES YAAAAAAAAAY....ok that shouldve done it im sooo happy because of that..now i can do more moves...hmm cant find other things to chat about...oh yeah ..hey tima-chan..cheer up..im sure thisll pass..things will be the same as always once again..just dont give up hope...oh and lynx27 is back ONLINE...he wasnt dead...im sending him an e_mail right after i post this..i must find out where he disappeared to..anyyyways...im very tired ..i wanna sleep ..zzzzzzzzzzz
gomen...
heeey ayuru-chan...i didnt mean that the trip wasnt good ..i loved it..i got to see one whole series of animem,meet nata-chan,gotlots of anime and games,saw a great movie..c'mon i loved it...but its just i dont wanna live in kuwait forever...and thanx for everything..i know you tried your best..sorry for the misunderstanding..
oh..lynx is still dead...WHERE ARE YOUUUUUUUU/?
waaaaaah..this weekend was so full of events "kinda"...yesterday i went to my friend's house and she showed us a ps2 game called "the bouncer"...after seeing this game i seriously thought about throwing my ps out of the window..it rocks...and today ..i went skating ,saw some friends..andthey did some moves that made e think about quiting..but the thoughts only lasted one second..coz i wont give up just like that....bwahahahahaa
anyyyyways...gotta leave now jaaaa
one down ....so many to go
waaah finnaly....i cant belive how long those six hours were...huff...and its gonna happen again an' again 5 days a week, 4 weeks a month,for 4 months....tasukete yooo...huff...and this stupid pc is not working right..im out of space...i think im gonna get a new one...ive got many things to download...oh..yeah ..i just watched a new anime..its kinda nice ..i liked it..its called outlaw star..its got some cute characters...anyyyways..dunno what im gonna do for the rest of the day..i think ill play some RPGs...final fantasy 9 should do...well then....
TADAIMAA
foxfire is baaaack...waaaaah ..that week seemed like an eternity ..thanx ruby for the maaany tapes you got me...and nata for the kawai bulbasaur ...i love it...my cousins were a pain...but i learned some stuff about me because of that...guess i was trying to be something i cant...annnnyways....where in the world are you lynx???im beggining to think you were sucked in a book or something :P...send me an e_mail as soon as you read this ...ok....well then...gotta go and ENJOY my new anime and RPGs
jaaa ne
ill miss ya
minnnaaaa...im leaving bahrain in about 2 hours ..going to out neighbouring country kuwait...i just realized that i dont like kuwait that much...i feel so insecure when im there..i feel more at home in london than in kuwait...wonder why??...and that realization led me to another one..i really love my country ..bahrain..its like this whole island is my home...i feel safe whereever i am in it...i can walk it all without fear of anything..anyyyway enough with that...im soon going to kuwait...god..there is someone that im really going to miss ..i feel like i wont be seeing this person for centurys when its only for one week..thanx onii-chan for your support ..i wasnt mad at you last night...i was a little hurt..i thought you understood me..but it seems like im truly weird for even you...and i should let you know that i dreamt about THAT twice last night..and i thought about it all night and morning..even now i cant help but think about it..anyyways..we went to hay's house last night...we really felt like we were from stone ages while he was in the year 3000 or something..he had all the consoles :playstaion,playstation2,dreamcast,n64,and lots of orginal games ..he should us some really modern technology :ff10,and some other ps2 and dc games...i wanna live at his house for one day only...i think its enough hehe..i feel kinda down..a little..i cant go skating for a week...so i cant meet some of my SPECIAL friends...heh..waaah i dont have time..im downloading a slow sad song to match my mood..im kinda into slow songs these days...and i listen to the lyrics more than before..i love backstreetboys' "how did i fall in love with you"...the words are beautiful...and so is the music..if you havent heard it then DOWNLOAD IT NOW..oooook im out of stuff to say...i wanna work on my layout...as soon as i draw a good ainme art ..ill scan it and put on and match the layout with it...if i get the time that is...im planning on joining a music institute after coming back..i wanna learn to play the violen..ive been dreaming of it since i was a kid...but i never go to myself to actually do it..but this time im sure..i will do it...i always admired YANNI..hes so cool...and he does the thing he loves ...i wanna be like him..i even memorized all his songs when i was 12..or was it 14..weird huh...ooook i have to leave now
jaaaaaa ne
tadaimaaa
waaaah...with so many things goin' on i couldnt really update much in the last month or so..gomen ne ....my cousins came from kuwait and went back...im enjoying my vecation..life is good "aside from those little things"....im going to kuwait as well ..soon...gotta get some new anime...waaah sorry but im not really in the mood to write much..in my next post.. ok
school is OUUUT
yaaaaaay school is finnaly ouuut ..now i can break something in that skating ring..and speaking about that..me and da guyz went there today..it wasnt really great coz i didnt do anyy new move or anythin..damn...i wanted to do that handstand move ..or touch the ceiling..but my trusty ol' blades are busted..had to get used to some new ones .:(..waaah...oh yeah and ayuru-san came to bahrain today...havent seen her yet..but ill be soon....well then ..me have to leave now..dont wanna waste my looooon vecation writing to nobody..hehe
im happy ..i guess
yoo guyz and girlz...i just came back from the mall ..dont some cool skatin' today..made some new friends"skating is a bliss"..there is this one extremly interisting kid..hes 9..hes a rebellios kid.."i like that type"..you know..the show-off..give-me-all-your-attension type..he says hes half from the khalifa family "the ruling and most powerfull family in bahrain"..and he says he hates it...its because he cant do whatever he wants ..and he always has a maid following him..its like a movie ..i didnt know people actually feel like this in real life..for some reason peole always turn to me when they want to talk to someone..but sometimes they expect so much..hmph..its too big a responsibility...but i cant turn away i guess..god its so quite in here..i agree with you lynx ...i sure would like someone in this room too...its just so .....dead..."but i guess there are too many people who do not understand"..grrrr damn you fadiel..you have all the luck..if there was somewhere i wanna be now it would be fadiel's house "he's my friend ..hes got the coolest family ever"....huh..whats this ..ayuru-chan digivolves to ayuru-san...cool...happy birthday ayuru-SAN..i hope you many happy years to come "and many bishis too hehe:P"..ill try to find you a kawai pinguin thingy....why did your birthday have to come up this month ..i already have someone special "hehe"in my birthday list...yeah someone reaaally special :P...i hope i can get the present on time though...ive been waiting for this for quiet a long time ....oh and by the way..we might go camping..me and my friends from the skating ring...but i dunno...if its worth it..ive got other stuff goin' on ..so im not sure im going...i heard the stars are beautifull over there...i love a sky full of star..i get so many mixed feelings when i look at it..the adventurous soul in me burns at the sight of it..and other stuff too..i guess i was born in the wrong world..oh yeah..i got braces..they are sectional so they dont show much..i dunno if i hate them or love them..i think they give me charecter ..but they can be annoying.hehe
i heard they were supposed to hurt..well im not feeling any pain..hehe i guess skating had me a bit stronger..oh ..and how come wwhenever i fall in love with a digimon it turns out to be a girl..i dont like girl digimon..anyone knows the japanese seyuu of parumon...shes so cuuuute..download the song "shinka de guts"and youll see what i mean....oh by the way ..lynx..i know exactly how you feel...some people just dont get it naaaaaah "sticking out tounge for all the brother dislikers outthere"..you should be thankfull coz youre blessed...hold on..everything is gonns be allright in the end lynx...cheer up.and download that song i wrote about earlier..that should cheer you up..hehe
im happy ..i guess
errrrr
yeeeha ..im done with all the tough exams...only two easy ones to go..ive done great in all of'em exept for the physics"grumble grumble".hey to hell with it..whats done is done..wet skating yesterday..hehe i finally did a 360 over my friend ...the poor thing ..i cant imagine how he felt when he was laying there watching me jump over him ..but hey ..life is full of sacrifices :P..ive been playing skies of arcadia ..extremly cool game..not very serious ..but funny .it has an averege storyline..but the gameplay and the battle systems are some of the best..and i like the charecter design...enough with skies of arcadia..hey ayuru..what do you want for a present..im not very creative,so you gotta tell me..hehe..ive been working on my anime art today...spent 2 hours sketching..but i really need to catch up..with many stuff going in my life on my art has been gettin' worst...i cant get my stick men right ..:(
oh and i wanted to share an insight that i got with you"hehe i like using big words"..throughout the exam days..i always thought of how life sux..and how i wanted a better life an'stuff...but after lots of thinking i realized ive got an almost perfect life...ive got health,money,lots of friends,little enemys,im doing great at school,im not a into drugs or smoking or anything like that.a good family,..and many other things .there are some lonly moments and sad times ..but hey thats the way life goes...and after all life isnt forever..its only a test that if you pass youll get to a much better place..so ill have to hold o for the next 60 years max..and in the end everything's gonna be allright.....
waaaah tasuketeee
grrrrri hate exams....i still have 4 units to go and its night already....why does it always happen to me.. :(
and ayuru-chan..i do keep my mobile phone open..but right now it wasnt working so i sent it for repairs..so its not my fault ..hehe....and when are you coming to bahrain??
.im into digimon songs at the moment ..some of them are so uplifting and cute..some are strong ..its a great anime with a great soundtrack.."still havent see it yet"well gotta go study .. ja neeee
tottemo genki yoooo :))
yaaay i had a great day today ...first i went to my grandma's ..it was kinda fun ..until my little cousin left..i like kids"only boys"..they are so much fun...and cute too..hehe anyway ..after that my other cousins had a small barbique..i dont like roasted food....dunno why..but then i went to the mall "hey hamad ..i heard you went there too..why didnt you call??"..there i met some friends of mine.."mostly kids"one of them is a legend in skating ..hes only 11 and he does really extremly cool moves ....like 360s over other skaters and other stuff ..hes kinda cute too..hes got two brothers who skate too..but hes the best,..i made some new friends too..one of them turned out to be a distant relative of mine...cool huh...i skated for a while ..worked on my jump and 360..and had great fun with the other guyz..one of them had a camira ,we took some pictures together..its great to have friends...hehe i guess i babbled a lot today ..i think this is enough ....ne
yattaaa
yeah ..i feel good nanananana...the chemistry exam was great ,"there was this one question though"but everything else was perfect..hehe..well 1 done 6 to go...im gonna study today and tomowrrow im going out..yahaaaa
no comment
well..nothing big happened today ..still lost in chemistry ..i still have the stupid toothache..im kinda bored..cant wait till the holiday..ill enjoy it to the fullest..thats all for to day
i feel good
hey guyz ..im feeling much better today...i had this terrible toothache all day long so couldnt study at all..but strangly im in a better mood than the one i had last night ..oh and ayuru-chan..im getting braces on the 15th ..i guess ..lynx..congratulations on your exam..i hope you do well in the upcoming ones.."give me some of your luck while youre at it hehe"..well then..i guess im going out to study today..wish me luck everyone..jaaa ne
i feel bad
hmmm...i still cant figure out whats my chemistry coure is about...i feel lonly ,depressed..sad..ive done something bad to a friend..i hope you can forgive me if youre reading this ..i only meant to help.i guess now you know everything about me..dont tell it to anyone ..please....now you understand why i couldnt tell you everything before..anyway ..i changed that e_mail :)
this is all
waaaaaah
ohh i dont know what to do ...ive seen some exams from the past years ..i cant make out most of the questions..ive tried stusying ..but i dont think i can do it alone..hehe i guess this is what friends are for..i might go out with some of them today or tomowrrow..a study/dinner outing ..i hope thatll work..ive got a dentist appointment in an hour..gotta go now..
i wanna sleeeeeep
yo...i just downloaded a song that i havent heard for a while ..its kinda cute..from an anime called ranma 1/2..its sung by my favourite character.."ryouga"..anyway..today i got my certificate in the japanese class ..i just completed my second course...i got a 90%...hmm i think i could have gotten a better mark if it wasnt a conversation test ..i dont do well in those...the next course is starting in feb ,ill do my best next time.. waaaaah ..ive got a stupid chemistry final test on wednesday ..i dont have the slightest idea on whats it about...i dunno what will i do.. hehe ill figure something out..and by the way ..lynx ..if you want tp get karsh's lv 7 tech move youll have to go to the island of the damned ..in the world that dario is already dead..mmi have to work on my drawing ...i dont have time to practice...:(
well then
yaaaaahaaaa finally ...i got a pitas page ..thanks to sadex13,ayuru and lynx27 ...oh by the way lynx..where did you get that nickname ??is it from an RPG called chronocross?ill add a link to your page from here ..you can do the same to mine..,,..oh ..i didnt introduce myself...im a 16 year old/male/ from bahrain..im into RPGs ,anime,manga,and almost anything japanese..im learning japanese at the moment ..i like cute stff "not babys..they are not cute"..
im qite a cheery person.."or at least i try to be">>well..gotta go change the layout of this page..mmmshall i have it cerulean or fuchisia..well..i think fuchisia is better ...
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